On environmentalism

Ever since Al Gore started ranting about climate change, stressing the need for green and alternative energies, the world over has been lit aflame by controversy as to whether or not the human species needs to change its fossil-fuel consuming ways or simply disregard the liberal media’s agenda for world domination. As the overwhelming amount of evidence has demonstrated, the centuries-long usage of fossil fuels by humans has resulted in rapid climate change - an increase in CO2 gasses that will lead to a rise in global temperature, something that would have catastrophic effects on ecosystems everywhere. At this point, the only people who contend the cause of global warming are fringe lunatics and the politicians that need their votes. Those morons are too easy of a target, so the purpose of this entry will instead target the people who’ve turned environmental awareness into another idiotic, hipster trend that undermines the credibility of people actually trying to reverse the damage of global warming.

What I find especially annoying about these new-age self-righteous hippies is the incredible guilt trip that they utilize like some sort of eco-weapon. If you don’t compost, you must not care about the earth. If you don’t drive a Prius, a vehicle ostensibly more durable than a piece of bread, you must hate the squirrels. If you don’t chain yourself to a tree in the Amazon forest, staring down the wrath of a thousand bulldozers, you’re some kind of Hummer-driving asshole. It seems with any worthy cause, you will always have some bandwagon group of suburban moms with too much money guilting you out of driving to the store, instead biking the ten mile distance. And I find that absurd.

Don’t get me wrong - being environmentally cautious and trying to be as green as possible is quite admirable, and I applaud anyone who does it because God knows I don’t. The problem is that it engenders a sense of self-righteousness and holier-than-thou attitudes that frankly do nothing to progress the cause, compelling only contempt and disgust from the people who actually want to make a difference. I’m sure Al Gore can utilize the legions of his rabid followers to march on Washington, but for now, they’ll only serve to annoy me with their elitist talk of farmers markets and sustainable dildo designs. Just like the protest generation of the 60s, the only thing that ruins a worthy cause is the people that follow the beliefs.